Hi. Shadow here.
It is that time of year.
It is Party time.
It is B.Y.O.B. time.
Opps. Sorry. I should have said it is “bring your own bag” time. To me, that makes it B.Y.O.B. time.
That’s right. It is hedge apple – Osage orange – let’s play fetch the natural way time.
I think it is a great time. Whenever Mike is ready to play fetch with me I always have a ball available. I don’t know why, but Mike and Jade don’t agree with me. They look at a yard full of those beautiful apples – (okay, they aren’t really apples, but I like them) – and complain.
The other day Jade picked up over 100 hedge apples in an area about the size of my floor pillow. She put them in garbage bags – she didn’t throw any for me. But, she seemed happy that she had cleared one little area.
Ha! I got the last laugh on her.
Yesterday we stood and looked at the area Jade had picked up last Wednesday. Mike counted 22 more hedge apples.
Make that 21.
I picked one up and gave it to Mike to throw for me.
He threw it. I got it. He threw it. I got it. He refused to throw it again.
All he said is “Yuk – get another one.”
Make that 20 good ones and one slightly used.
I picked up another and we played throw-chase-bring back -throw again. After a couple more throws I decided to rest a bit. That is when I heard Jade and Mike talk about all the hedge apples on the ground. (There must be a million or so – that is in dog numbers. I don’t know how many there are in human numbers, but there are a lot.)
I thought I would help.
I reminded them that last year they put some of those hedge apples around the house so that spiders would stay away. At first, when Jade “placed” the hedge apples in various places in the house, I thought it was a good idea.
Then later, I got to thinking – “do those hedge apples really keep spiders away?” I had to admit I didn’t see any spiders, but maybe there weren’t any spiders in the first place.
It really didn’t matter to me, I decided whether those “apples” worked or not, there were better places for them. So, I started rearranging. I have to admit most of my rearranging was picking one up and taking it outside so I would have it when Mike was ready to play.
I don’t know why, but Jade didn’t appreciate all the rearranging work I did.
Maybe that is why she hasn’t put some of the new ones in the house this year.
Then, I told them about a story I heard that the juice from Osage oranges could be helpful to those suffering from cancer. In fact, I reminded them that one man had asked for a bag of those Osage oranges for his uncle who has cancer. (They are called hedge apples for spiders and Osage oranges for people. Go figure. I just call them balls).
Mike told me that he had looked into that claim and found a lot of believers, but no scientific or medical evidence that this is true. Since I have no idea what “scientific or medical evidence” means, I just picked up another “ball” and gave it to him.
I know “Shadow evidence” proves Osage orange/hedge apples are good for playing “fetch.”
Still, I can’t use all million of those things so I had Mike check EBay. Sure enough, Osage orange/hedge apples are a big item. Hundreds have been sold recently.
More Osage Orange than hedge apples – go figure.
I don’t think I convinced Mike that that is the way to get rid of all those hedge apples.
So, I came up with the B.Y.O.B. idea.
I suggested that Mike and Jade give hedge apples away to anyone who brings his/her bag and picks the “apples’ up from the ground.
And one more thing.
While picking up the hedge apples, I will be available to chase one every once in a while. My idea is, if you throw at least two hedge apples for me to fetch, the one’s you put in your bag will be free.
If you don’t throw for me, the hedge apples are $1.00 apiece.
You can’t beat that deal.
But, you might want to wear gloves. That might keep you from saying “Yuk.”
Mike doesn’t wear gloves. That’s his problem – not mine.
Oh – I forgot to tell you – you can contact me (or Mike or Jade) if you want any of those hedge apples.
Don’t forget – it’s B.Y.O.B. time.
Better hurry – they’re dropping fast.